Fic: Remembrance

[foxysquidalso]

I actually wrote this a while ago, then never posted it! So I read through it again and polished it up a bit, and I figured I might as well post it now. After all, why not?

Title: Remembrance
Fandom: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Word count: 1,740
Characters: Sokka, Katara
Pairing: Hakoda/Bato (implied)
Rating: G
Notes: Katara and Sokka are forced to deal with new developments in their father's life.


Remembrance.


Sokka strolled across the deck towards his sister. She must have heard his approach, but she didn't turn towards him. "Hey," he called out. Katara stood at the railing, gazing out over the side of the ship. The wind had picked up as the sun set, and it gently stirred her hair, though it wasn't strong enough to move the heavy braid at her back. Her scarlet cloak was held closed by the Fire Nation brooch she wore, but that must not have been enough for her, because she was holding the cloth over her throat, her hand clenched beneath her chin. It looked a little weird the way she was doing it, and he wondered at the reason behind it. It wasn't that cold out.

"Hi, Sokka." Her voice was flat, a little distant.

"You tired?" he asked. He smiled reassuringly, but she didn't look at him, so the reassurance went to waste. He'd thought she'd cheer up now that Aang was awake again, and it was true that she had seemed to be in a better mood when she was talking to Aang, but now--well, she didn't look happy now.

"No, I'm not tired."

"You want some soup? I can get you some."

"I don't want any soup."

"You should eat something, though. I know healing Aang really takes it out of you--"

"I'm fine," she snapped, whirling to face him, one hand settling on her hip while the other held on to her cloak. "Can't you leave me alone?"

"All right, all right settle down." Sokka took a step back, raising his hands, palms facing her in a gesture of peace. As he did so, he realized what she was doing. Through the thick fabric of the cloak, she was gripping the pendant of Mom's necklace. Sokka felt a twinge in his stomach and lowered his arms. He opened his mouth to say something about it, but for once, he managed to stop himself in time. He clamped his lips shut and waited a few beats to make sure he had the impulse under control.

In the space of this pause, Katara returned to her previous position, gazing at the sea. Sokka put his hands on the railing next to her and followed her gaze. "So. Lookin' at the ocean, huh?"

Katara sighed, heavily. He didn't need to look at her to know she was rolling her eyes. "Yes, Sokka. I'm looking at the ocean."

He wanted to distract her from whatever was upsetting her. "How about you show me some fancy Waterbending?"

"I don't think that would be the best idea right now."

"Come on, why not?"

"Someone might see. Haven't we had enough trouble to deal with?"

"Aww, but it's dark out. Who's gonna see us?"

"Since when are you interested in fancy Waterbending?"

Her tone was so angry that Sokka turned. Katara was facing him again, her gaze fierce. "Hey," he said, frowning. "What are you so angry at me for? I didn't do anything. I'm just making conversation."

"Maybe I don't want a conversation."

"Well, that's too bad, cause you've got one. What's wrong with you, anyway?" He didn't look at her hand, still clasping the necklace in that weird way, as if she wanted to hide what she was doing--which wasn't working.

"Nothing's wrong. I just want to be alone."

"Uh, okay. For one thing? I know you. I know when something's wrong. And something's wrong. So why don't you just tell me what it is?"

Still glaring at him, she seemed about to say something, but she hesitated. Instead of speaking, she made an infuriated noise, once again turning away. "Never mind! You wouldn't understand."

"What makes you say that?"

A wave hit the side of the ship, a little too high and too hard to be natural. That wasn't the kind of Waterbending Sokka had had in mind. He stepped back as the spray struck his face. Katara raised her voice. "Because you don't! You act like everything's perfectly fine! Like you don't even care!"

If she didn't keep it down, everyone on board was going to some over to see what was wrong. Sokka understood that she was upset, but that didn't give her the right to take it out on him. "What's that supposed to mean?" he demanded. "That doesn't even make sense. Of course I care! I care every bit as much as you do. I'm the one who had the idea for this invasion--"

"I'm not talking about the invasion, Sokka."

"Then what's this about?"

"See, you don't even know. You--"

"Is this about Dad?" he asked sharply. When she didn't answer, he knew he was right. "I know you're angry at him."

If he'd had any doubts about being right, they would have been dispelled by the look that crept into her eyes, an expression she tried to hide from him by once again turning her attention towards the sea. "Why would I be angry at him?" she asked softly.

"I don't know. Why don't you tell me?"

Her anger had faded for the moment, but Katara didn't seem any happier. "It doesn't matter."

"Sure it does. It matters to me." He reached out and gave her shoulder a quick pat. "If you can't tell your big brother, who can you tell?"

She didn't pull away from him, which he considered a good sign. "I don't want to talk about it."

"Well, you should. You can't go on snapping at him all the time for the rest of your life."

"I'm not snapping at him."

"Uh huh. Right."

"I'm not." Although she didn't quite raise her voice again, her tone grew fervent, and he could tell she was heating up again. Sokka took a cautionary step back from the railing in case of killer waves. "You don't even know what you're talking about--you don't know anything. You're just as bad as he is."

"I'm what? Uh, I don't care if I'm as 'bad' as he is, since he obviously isn't bad at all."

"Yes, he is. Both of you are. You both act as if--" She broke off.

"What, Katara? As if what?" He wasn't going to let this go. No matter what it was that was bothering her, she needed to get it out somehow.

"You act like you forgot about Mom."

Sokka blinked, stunned. He felt another twinge in his stomach, this one more painful than the first. "Katara..."

"I know. I know it's not true, all right?" Katara's voice was distant now. The intensity had drained from it all at once. "Of course you didn't forget. It's stupid. But I feel that way. I can't help it. Every time I see them."

"Every time you see who?"

"You know who I mean, Sokka."

"Are you talking about Bato?"

She exhaled, air hissing between her teeth. "Of course I am, even if you act like it's not happening."

"I'm not acting like it's not happening. I'm acting like it's normal, because it is. It doesn't bother me. There's nothing wrong with it."

Katara shifted her grip on Mom's necklace, letting the cloak fall away so her fingers touched the carving. "I didn't say there was anything wrong with it. But it's different!"

"Why? Because it's Dad?"

Katara frowned.

"Is he supposed to be alone forever so you can feel better?" Sokka snapped. Even as he said the words, he knew what her answer to that question would be. He was being unfair. And he realized, suddenly, that in spite of what he'd said before, some hard, tiny part of him had wanted exactly that. For Dad not to be with anyone else. For him to be unhappy. But as soon as the words were out of his mouth, that part of him seemed--not to go away, but to soften somehow.

"Sokka!" Katara protested. "I never said that. Of course I don't want--I don't want him to be alone. Why would I want that? I love him." She pressed her free hand to her temple. "But I feel so strange. Like this isn't the way things should be." She sighed. "That sounds so stupid. I know I sound like such a child."

"No," he said. "You just miss Mom. We all do. Dad does, too."

"I know," sighed Katara.

"You should talk to him."

"No, Sokka, I can't."

"You're going to have to do something."

She narrowed her eyes. "You knew. Why didn't you tell me, Sokka? Why couldn't you have said something?"

Sokka considered her question. He supposed it was a fair one. "I don't know. I just never thought to?" In a way, he hadn't wanted to. What could he have said? I think Dad's in love with Bato? He had been selfishly hoping that she would find out on her own, but he hadn't considered the fact that it might upset her. Dad and Bato had always been together; now they were just together in a different way. Things like that weren't exactly common, but they weren't unheard of, either. It was just--something that happened sometimes. "I should have, I guess. I'm sorry." He paused, took a breath. "Come on. Talk to him. Not about that, if you don't want. But talk to him, okay?"

Katara shook her head. "I don't know what to say to him. Besides, every time I see him he's with Bato."

"You could ask to talk to him alone."

"Sokka--"

"I know it's not easy, but you've got to try. He loves you. He didn't want to go away." He put a hand on her shoulder again, and this time he kept it there.

"I know." She stood beside him. At last, she let the necklace go. Her hands fell to her sides. "But I still feel so angry. I feel like I don't know what to do about anything anymore."

Sokka spoke with a confidence he did not feel. "Don't worry. Everything's going to be fine."

They gazed out at the sea together. "Maybe you're right," Katara said, but Sokka could tell by her expression that she didn't believe him.

Frowning, Sokka watched the pale moonlight dance across the dark water. Dad and Mom had loved each other for years. But he knew that Dad hadn't stopped loving her, even now. "Of course I'm right," he said. "I'm always right."

Katara snorted incredulously.

For what seemed a long time after that, he and his sister stood side by side in silence, looking at the waves.